3/20/09

Paranoia

I am beginning to really worry that I'm turning into a hypochondriac.

And then I think that because I'm worrying about turning into a hypochondriac, I'm really a hypochondriac, for worrying about becoming a hypochondriac (get it? It's a vicious cycle.)

Lately, I've been learning about this MS drug at work...so I've convinced myself that I have MS.

It would explain the following symptoms:
1) Dizziness
2) Blurred vision
3) Extremely bloodshot eyes
4) Loss of feeling in extremities/ numbness
5) Impaired thinking (kidding...kind of.)

But so would a massive hangover...but I haven't been drinking TOO much lately (except for St. Paddy's Day)...

So chances are it's not MS.

Maybe I've got... Chinesefooditis.

Instead of MS...it's MSG!

See. I eat a lot of Chinese food. And everyone knows that the best ingredient of Chinese food is the MSG. It seriously makes it so much more delicious. And sure, I don't know what excess MSG does to the body, but it can't be good.

Probably not that though...but seriously...

I've noticed this to be a growing trend among my peers: an increased awareness of their health. Everyone seems to think they have something these days.

We're probably all fine, just miserable at our entry level jobs or flailing in the face of change and increased work.

That sounds about right to me...anything for a sick day!

(Shoutout to HS for her inspiration...MSG).

5 comments:

  1. you did preditc cancner!

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  2. I love Chinese food. I also don't care enough about MSG to stop eating it.
    And you don't have MS, you have denial. It's a condition where you think that you can drink excessively during the week, have a full time job, and manage lupus, your body sans a thyroid, and other related ailments.

    I will say though that I am a huge hypochondriac.

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  3. I don't drink during the week! I go out once a weekend! ST. PATRICK'S DAY WAS AN EXCEPTION.

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  4. I know, I also thought of you and your law school stats...we all are, Gen. We all are.

    ReplyDelete