the free pass is my youth, slowly floating away.
i can cling to it. i can be drunk and foolish.
i can tweet and blog about the dumb things i do,
the trips i take,
the people i let in for a second or two
and then quickly discard.
i am young!
i can feel things but face them later.
i can see it, drink, and forget.
or i can be present.
and feel those things now.
and not ignore it.
and do what i should.
become a better version of myself.
the person i can be.
the person i always have been,
even as i've hid it,
and drank it away,
and melted those feelings into one big lump.
the lump that's hard to swallow.
i can look in the mirror and see everything,
i can do that.