1) Instant rehydration + possible hunger relief (I haven’t eaten/drank/talked since Monday)
2) Morphine! I UNDERSTAND YOU, HEROIN ADDICTS!
3) Attention (duh.)
4) Gifts (duh.)
1) I always get admitted, due to my colorful medical history.
2) Being paired with an old roommate who yells at me for wearing V-neck t-shirts and booty boxers and calls me a slut, just like last time (see July, 2011)
3) Um, you never sleep in the hospital.
4) MY PARENTS AND SISTER LIVE IN NEW JERSEY WHICH IS SO FAR.
5) Every single thing about the hospital experience, including the fact I’d have to talk to the doctors, which I cannot do right now in my current state.
6) I never look good enough in the hospital to post an emo picture of myself on Tumblr.
7) MY FAVORITE SPORTS TEAM IN THE WORLD IS PLAYING IN THE SUPER BOWL IN 3 DAYS! I can’t even risk missing that. There’s just no way.
Decision to be made at 10 am if I fail to get a wink of sleep (it’s 6 now.)